Tale of the Trail – Chicago Hash #1574 – 11.30.08 @ Mitchell's

 
HASH TRASH - Tale of the Trail
Chicago Hash #1574 - Nov. 30, 2008  @ MITCHELL'S (THE OLD PUFFER's)

HARES: Bloody Thighs, Lifa, Mudsucker
VIRGINS:
VISITORS:  Cums in Taxi's, Just Greg, Abu Beaver
HASHERS:  Happy Ass Grabber, Ez on the Ass, Chicken Stiffer, R-Tard-E, Just I Lean, Milk-My-Yak, Public Pisser, Erin Go Buff, Snatchsquatch, Horn-e
Total- 16

It was a cold Sunday on a Holiday weekend on the South side that saw the hash running thru some historical sites.   Today we ran thru the old Union Stockyard Entrance and along Bubbling Creek.   We also passed the Church our very own Mayor Daley attends and then finally ended up at the house of MUDSUCKER for a beer stop.  The Pack saw some die-hards come out today on a rainy cold trail.   ERIN GO BUFF showed up in the nick of time just before the pack was on out.   The Main pack today was HAPPY, EZ, CHICKEN, P-P, ERIN GO BUFF, JUST GREG, and ABU BEAVER.  We seemed to work well and find the correct trail.  ERIN GO BUFF and I even find a quick short cut over a fence while the rest of the pack did a circle jerk that ended up on 35th street.   R-TARD-E and JUST I LEAN were walking and running today so they were a little behind.  JUST GREG tried whistling for HORN-E but he said he just climbing a tree to try a get to a short cut?  The pack ran many straight a-ways today but we finally did make it back to the bar where MILK-MY-YAK and SNATCHSQUATCH were waiting for us to return.  MUDSUCKER set-up free hotdogs for us and $6 pitchers, which was not a bad combo for the day.  We had a quick circle and then many ran back home to watch a dismal Bears game.

--
Chicken Stiffer
CH3-GM

_______

Hare(s): Lifa, Bloody Thighs & Mudsucker
Venue: Mitchells, 3356 S. Halsted (used to be Puffers)
Hash Cash: Still only a mere $8 despite the government's latest bailout of Citigroup!

The pitchers will be $6.25 each (normal price) but they will also put out hot dogs for us to eat.

Be prepared to run some train tracks, e.g. urban shiggy.

I will have the Bears on the big screen TV after the hash (Sunday night game), so the party can gravitate to Mudsucker’s abode after the hash to watch the Bears crush (hopefully) the Vikings!!!

Mud

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit
From the Lincoln Park/Lakeview "Green Zone": Red Line to 35th, hoof it four blocks East to Halsted and then two blocks South on Halsted to the bar.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Blue Line to Jackson, switch to Red Line to 35th, hoof it four blocks East to Halsted and then two blocks South on Halsted to the bar.

or - Orange Line to Halsted, then #8 Halsted bus south for 1 mile to 33rd.

Driving

Hop into your hooptie and cruise to exit the Dan Ryan at 31st street, west to Halsted (3/4 mile), left to 3356. Or exit 35th (Sox Park), west to Halsted, right to 3356.

 

Click here for info and regos for Chicago's 7th Annual Great Anthrax Scare Hash & Santa Hat Run

 

Tale of the Trail – Chicago Hash #1573 – 11.23.08 @ Casa de Just Shaina – Thanksgiving Dinner Hash

 

We have turkey, cornbread, mac & cheese,  oh and beer  a keg.  Shaina's place has a 50 inch plamsa so the bears game will be on!!!!! 

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit
From the Lincoln Park/Lakeview "Green Zone": Red Line to Belmont, Belmont 77 bus West to Monticello between Monticello and Lawndale which is generally between the Kennedy and Milwaukee Ave.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Blue Line to Belmont, hoof it a few blocks west to Monticello.

Driving

Hop into your hooptie and cruise to Belmont & Monticello. I have absolutely no idea what parking is like in this area but shouldn't be too bad.

 

Click here for info and regos for Chicago's 7th Annual Great Anthrax Scare Hash & Santa Hat Run

 

Tale of The Trail – Chicago Hash #1572 11.16.08 @ Mad River

  

Nov. 16, 2008  @  Mad River Tavern
HASH TRASH - Tale of the Trail
Chicago Hash #1572

HARES: Crop Duster & R-Tard-E
VIRGINS: Just Randy, Just Jessica, Just Sarah
VISITORS:  Mookie  (Stockholm Hash)
HASHERS: Just Taylor, Snatchsquatch, Chicken Stiffer, Erin Go Buff, Horn-e, Hot Pants, Friend of Hot Pants, Smell This, Glory Hole, Stupid Man, One Handed Typist, Just Adam, Stab'em and Slab'em, Its Too Soft, Cumma Slutra, Super Stuffher, Milk My Yak, Barks on All Fours, Good Swallow, Virgin Banger, Mudsucker, Cunt and Pasties, Peterbilt, Calvin Klein, Batteries Not Included, Happy Ass Grabber

TOTAL HASHERS –   32

R-TARD-E and CROP DUSTER set trail from the Mad River bar and R-TARD-E redeemed himself by setting a trail that ran NW of the bar and used ever alley and gangway he could find on the NW of the Lakeview area.  The Trail saw 32 hashers show up at the bar but only 13 people ran.  That is what happens when Green Bay plays the Bears and the weather gets a little cold outside some would rather watch the game or stay warm oh darn.  

The runners took off and I sent the walkers to ITS TOO SOFTS Place for the beer stop and I heard MILK MY YAK, BARKS ON ALL FOURS, GOOD SWALLOW, STUPIDMAN and others had a great time starting a fire but no beer was there because the hares decided to change the beer stop to another location.   So NO BEER FOR YOU!!!     I caught up to the pack just as it started running thru its first gangway and ERIN GO BUFF had the lead.  ITS TOO SOFT and SNATCHSQUATCH were bringing up the rear must of the day and the trail wound its way thru the Lakeview neighborhood.  R-TARD even managed to find a six-inch crack between two buildings to set the trail thru.   I'm glad the trail was set before Thanksgiving otherwise I would have been too fat to fit my chicken legs thru the opening.  

 The next part of the trail saw numerous splits into condo courtyards that were false trails but eventually GLORY HOLE found the right hole to dart thru and we were racing for a beer check in the alley but some misguided resident thought he had some street person living behind his garage and decided to throw the beer away. YES I SAID HE THREW THE BEER AWAY.   His address was 1356 W. Diversey if you wish to send him a letter.  MOOKIE was FRB at this point and jumped over a Shell Stations fence and was back on trail that looked like it was approaching Wrigley Field but it quickly turned back south towards Belmont.   JUST ADAM found trail and eventually it lead to a beer stop where CROP DUSTER only just knocked on the door of MARY ANNE and GINGER and they graciously allowed us to use their porch for a beer stop. 

The sign said "Parties not allowed and tenants only!"   but that does not stop the CH3.  We took a few pictures with that sign and waited for the pack to show up.   CUMMMA SLUTRA turned out to be the DFL and FBI.   It was cold outside so we ran back to the bar and saw our beloved Bears being killed 37-3 and most of the wankers were still at Vaughn's Pub. 

We quickly changed venue and rolled over to Mad River where we had $6 pitchers of beer.  SMELL THIS, USDA GRADE ROTTEN WHORE, and ODOR EATER snagged two virgins JUST SARAH and JUST JESSICA to roll with us; many of the male hashers did not disapprove of this turn of events.  SNATCHSQUATCH and I got the circle going and we got thru the FRB, DFL, announcements and then CALVIN AND BATTERIES walked in so CALVIN took over his RA roll with SNATCHSQUATCH as his sidekick. 

ONE HANDED TYPIST was here even though the weather was below 35-degrees outside; I guess we can't put him up for the warm weather wanker award this year.  JUST RANDY was welcomed to the hash and we hope to coax him out of Lombard once in a while to hash with us.  Eventually the hash were the only folks left in the bar after the Eagles fans left dejected from a football tie with the Sin City Bengals, but for some reason ITS TOO SOFT stayed.  I don't know how but the circle eventually closed after numerous accusations, puke, ear licking, and pitchers of beer!!!

NEXT WEEK HASH is the CH3 THANKSGIVING DAY HASH

VENUE: JUST SHAINA's house.

FOOD and BEER will be provided!!! 

HARES:  JUST SHAINA, GINGER SNATCH, and POULTRY F*CKER

________
Hare(s): Crop Duster & R Tard E
Venue: Mad River - 2909 N. Sheffield
Hash Cash: Still only a mere $8 despite The Great Obama Landslide of 2008!

Note this will overlap the Philadelphia Eagles Club of Chicago's weekly gamewatching party so we should be able to get their specials too ($6 pitchers of Coors Light and 1/2 price Philly Cheesesteaks!!)

Note some folks will be gathering at noon for the Bears game before the hash.

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit
From the Lincoln Park/Lakeview "Green Zone": Red Line to Belmont, walk three blocks South on Sheffield between Oakdale & George or Brown Line to Diversey and hoof it two blocks North to George.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Blue Line to Belmont, Belmont 77 bus East to Sheffield, walk three blocks South between Oakdale & George.

Driving

Hop into your hooptie and cruise Kennedy to Belmont, East to Sheffield, South to Oakdale.

Tale of the Trail – Chicago #1571 11.9.08 @ Windsor Tavern

 

HASH TRASH - Tale of the Trail
Chicago Hash #1571
Nov. 9, 2008 @ Windsor Tavern
HARES: Cumma Slutra & Virgin Banger
VIRGINS: Just Ashley, Just Jessica
VISITORS:
HASHERS: Bang Me Blow Me Get Me Off, Bloody Thighs, Chicken Stiffer, Erin Go Bra, Hoosier Daddy, Horn-E, Just Taylor, Just Hooper, Mudsucker, One-Handed Typist, Poultry F*cker, Rent-A-Virgin (cameo), and Sir Poops Alot
TOTAL HASHERS – 17 on a cold and snowy taste of what winter will be like!

Fujirazzi pix on the CH3 website and http://www.kodakgallery.com/ShareLanding.action?c=kuxb1a3.4u21xm0b&x=0&y=lbcd0s&localeid=en_US

Let's see, the last time we were at Windsor Tavern it was for Idiot's Day in December 2006 and there was snow everywhere so today couldn't be all that bad, right? About a dozen hashers gathered outside as the hares explained the trail and the marks. When asked whether the beer stop would be indoors the hares quickly evaded answering. Yes, expect an outdoor beer check.

The weather wasn't really all that bad with the ambient temperature around 40 degrees with light overcast skies as the pack headed out to a not that bad trail which headed generally southwest towards Portage Park in roughly a saw-tooth pattern even skirting around the edge of Portage Park (the park itself) before finally plunging in towards the south and exiting the Northeast corner.

It was definitely a fast "two-pack" trail with a bunch of those of us up front running almost constantly and widening the distance between us and the slower runners & walkers. After nearly as much pavement pounding as the Bank of America Chicago Half Marathon, the welcome "Beer Near" was spotted which led to Cumma Slutra's dad's crib where we partook of such fine craft macrobrews as PBR, Old Style and Bud Light. There were a few Guinness’s buried in there too but I suspect given their odd number (not 6 or 12) were leftovers from something else. As a bonus the pack was also treated to chicken soup which Cumma Slutra's father made for us as he apparently cooks on Sunday for the entire week so it was easy to scale up a batch and felt okay about the chicken in the soup as we knew our Chicken was safe at Soldier Field watching the Bears get pounded by the Titans.

Back to the bar was minor death march of its own with long straight-aways up Central and across Montrose as Bang Me Blow Me and One-Handed Typist were essentially racing each other back to the bar because it was getting "cold". To be fair there was enough wind to make the 40 degree ambient temperature feel like we should be seeing pools of liquid nitrogen starting to form on the sidewalk.

Once back at the bar we were surprised to see the Chickens dining on their fine board of fare figuring they must have pulled off the greatest traffic miracle of all time getting all the way up from Soldier Field to beat the pack back to the bar, in reality they bailed after the third quarter. So much for Rex Grossman being the salvation of the 2008 season.

With Chicken back in action he acted as ersatz RA as for some reason (location maybe) this was almost a completely different crew than we had out last week. In the circle, our hares Cumma Slutra and Virgin Banger got their usual hare down downs, and then Bang Me Blow Me and One-Handed Typist got down downs for being FRB/FBI racing back to the bar in addition to being the only "twins" present.

Then our virgins Just Ashley and Just Jessica got the only down down they would ever have to at a hash (note Just Jessica hails from "The Other Grand Rapids" - MINNESOTA not MICHIGAN), then the usual hash attire and other silly down downs followed ending with hash religion per ritual and tradition.  After the circle people continued the party longer than usual and I think we passed the hat twice, finally it was time to bag out and head for my next party, Eagles game watching at Mad River where my birds just did not have enough juice to overcome the onslaught of the defending Super Bowl champs NY Giants.

Next couple of weeks we get back-to-back R T Tard E trails the second one of which we're gonna do our annual Thanksgiving Dinner hash with Turkey and fixins' the Sunday of Thanksgiving weekend and don't forget, we're now taking regos for the CH3's biggest event of the year, our 7th Annual Great Chicago Anthrax Scare Hash / Santa Hat Run. Can we break our record of 114 hashers this year? We're gonna be at our favorite hash bar The Beaumont this year - talk about some real Change You Can Believe In. Price is $30 now but goes up this weekend to $35 so register today!

Party on on,

Fuji / It's Too Soft
Consigliere, Hash Flash and Web Dude
THE Chicago Hash House Harriers

___________
Hare(s): Cuma Slutra & Virgin Banger
Venue: Windsor Tavern - 4530 N Milwaukee Ave
Hash Cash: Still only a mere $8 despite GM's vehicle sales falling 45% in October. Have people finally figured out that huge, gas-guzzling trucks are not a good idea after all? Medium-sized, beer-guzzling hashers are much better.

Environmentally-Friendly Public Transit
From the Lincoln Park/Lakeview "Green Zone": Red Line to Wilson, Montrose 78 bus West to Milwaukee, hoof it three blocks NW on Milwaukee to da bar.
From Wicker Park/Bucktown: Blue Line to Jefferson Park, hoof it three blocks SE on Milwaukee to da bar.

Driving

Hop into your hooptie and cruise to Milwaukee and Windsor which is roughly equidistant between Montrose and Lawrence. Driving coming from either south or really north west take the Kennedy, take the Lawrence exit and turn right.  Turn left at Milwakee, turn right onto Windsor (ignore the contruction).  There is plenty of FREE residential parking on the street!!!!

Tale of the Trail – Chicago Hash #1570 11.2.08 @ The Atlantic (w/MisManageMent)

 

 

Chicago hash Tale of the Trail 11.2.08 and Tuesday Election Party

Nov. 2, 2008 Bar Atlantic
HARES: I Like Dick, R-Tard-E
VIRGINS: Just Jennifer, Just Damon, Just Hooper
VISITORS: Rub My Disc
HASHERS: Chicken Stiffer, Erin Go Bra, Calvin Klein, Mouthful of Meat, It's Too Soft, Horn-e, Up Loader, Soggy Deposit, Are they Real, Cumma Slutra, Stupid Man, Stab'em and Slab'em, Hoosier Daddy, Crop Duster, Snatchsquatch, Just Kat, W'All Bang'her, Just Ira, More Tail, KGB, Just Taylor, Mudsucker, Dry Erase Board
TOTAL HASHERS – 29 yes there were 29 hashers on such a nice day!!!!!

Today the hash started early with some of us getting together to watch the Bears play and eventually win against the Lions. Stupidman, Calvin Klein, and I watched the Bears pull of the fantastic finish. 29 hashers eventually hashed today with I Like Dick playing the part of interpreter for R-Tard-E who spoke R-Tard-ese. The circle was a little different today with I like Dick bouncing around the circle asking for names but it seemed to work. The pack was off and Stupidman, Calvin Klein, and I went back inside to watch the game. After the game we walked to the beer stop and ran into Mouthful of Meat, Just Taylor, Dry Erase Board, and Erin Go Bra coming back to the bar. Mouthful of Meat perturbed because she missed the beer stop so we took them back to the parking garage and found the pack drinking on the roof. Just Jennifer and Just Damon said they had a good time and will be back in the future and Up Loader gets the award this year for bringing many virgins to the hash. His virgin Just Hooper also had a good time and he was seen later talking with a 2^{nd time running Just Kat in circle hopefully we will see them many times in the future months.}

------

CH3 Fall MisManageMent Results:

 CH3 MISMANAGEMENT HIGHLIGHTS

11/2/08 at 1 pm'ish Bears on at NOON!!! Bears WIN!!!!

Bar Atlantic -5062 N. Lincoln Ave, CHICAGO, IL

We have seen 1518 hashers run with us this year about 150 more people than last year at this time. That equals about 3 more hashers per hash at each of the 45 hashes we had this year so nice job CH3 in getting virgins to cum and then having the staying power to keep them cumming!!!

WE ARE AVG.- 33 hashers per hash this year!! Avg. 3 more hashers per hash this year as compared to last year.

Hashers Present- Chicken Stiffer-Gm, Calvin Klein- RA, It's Too Soft- Web Dude, Mouthful of Meat- HareRazor, Erin Go Bra- Hasher, Horn-e- Hasher

1. Verify funds We have $1032 in hash cash.
2. Hash Tax and cash kept at $1 per person and $8 total? Keep hash tax the way it is. approved
3. Turn over $1000 for new GM in 2009.
4. Collected $356 so far this year in haberdashery $$$. We will be buying new haberdashery soon.
5. $246 in hash tax collected this year that is $5 a hash. We Have only collected $5 per hash for hash tax this year
6. Donated $50 in hash cash to TH3 PINK DRESS for the beer stop.
7. Paid $84 for CH3 flag which was stolen by 2^{nd city a year ago and not returned. Hash flag purchase was approved by those present.}
8. $25 for CH3 photos to be easily accessed online. Ask ITS TOO SOFT This allows for easy download of hash pictures

B. ANTHRAX Hash –Quick notes
1. December 19-21st weekend is the date
2. Where do we have it? Beaumonts 2020 N. Halsted
3. Volunteers to help Mismanagement run the event.
4. Cost should be around $30
5. Hotels- Arlington house youth Hostel and Days Inn on Diversey

C. Calendar
1. POWER OF THE PUSSY (POP) July 11-13 Weekend!! What a weekend 88 hashers showed. NICE JOB!!
2. Nov. 23 is CH3 Thanksgiving Day Hash at Just Shaina's. FOOD AND BEER WILL FLOW!!!!
3. Elections are cumming up who will be CH3 GM next year nominations will be in January and Elections in February. Elections will begin in Jan. with Nominations and per HORN-E's suggestion last year each hasher will receive one vote per each hash they attended this year. Hashers will have a chance to vote in the first two weeks in February either at the hash or via e-mail. This was approved by all present.
4. Hash Ball Date Feb. or beginning of March Suggestion was made to use the 4-treys for hashball and ask milk my yak to make beer for us again.

COMMITTEE REPORTS

D. Hare Razor- Mouthful and Batteries
1. NICE JOB KEEPING US WITH HARES Looks like we have hares until Jan.
2. Have a new Bar wiki so hares can find hash friendly Bars.
3. Phone line will only carry CH3 and TH3 updates other hashes have decided not to be part of hash line. Just I LEAN nice job with phone line. Just I Lean may be moving so we may need a new hasher to run the phone line.

0E. WEB dude and Social chair- GREAT WORK IN UPDATING THE WEBSITE
1. ITS TOO SOFT now puts out the CH3 hareline.
2. If you want to be put on or taken off the CH3 Hareline tell him.
3. We have new picture site that CH3 posts web dudes photos on.

F. Haberdashery could use new Haberdashery- Schwiiinga?
1. Very Low on Haberdashery we will make new shit in the cumming weeks.
2. Tank Tops and Dri-knit? We will be looking to get tech gear with our new haberdashery purchase.

G. RA's & circle: Calvin & Enema Canal
1. New songs?

H. Misc
1. Big Hump Green dress in March
2. Indyscent prom dress last weekend in April!!!

New Business

?????

Can't think of anything e-mail me if you wish to add anything here??

Happy Ass Grabber asked that the TH3 info be included on the CH3 website the CH3 MM has no problem with that and IT's TOO SOFT has been posting the info on the CH3 site for the past couple of months.

A. Budget- The Budget was approved by those present.

GM REPORT-

The pack made its way back to the bar and Calvin convened the circle. Crop Duster and KGB were the FRB's I believe and Cumma Slutra, our hare next week was the FBI. Rub My Disc brought us good tidings from Ohio and this new transplant promises to be back hashing with us in the near future. Mudsucker walked in hair disheveled after spending the morning on the couch watching the Bears and he will have a chili party on Saturday night. We had many twins today with Stab'em and Slab'em, Snatchsquatch, Just Kat, Up loader, and others wearing coordinated hash gear for today's run. Eventually the circle closed but that did not end the festivities for the day. We reconvened the circle at W'All Bangher request and brought in Just Ira for her naming. Many suggestions were made but she was finally named SOUR KROTCH by a 10 to 3 vote by those hashers present. This name was suggested because she made sauerkraut for the previous hash at W'All Bangher house. We will miss her as she returns to Germany this week.

Tuesday saw about 15 people gather at Party Central for an election party. More Tail, Just Taylor, Snatchsquatch, Chicken Stiffer, Poultry Fucker, Its Too Soft, Are they Real, and others were present for this momentous occasion. Hell we should have had an impromptu hash at 7 pm and a quick circle before the O'bama speech at 10 pm. Hopefully we will see a nice turn out at the Chili party at MUDSUCKERS on Saturday and congrats to Mr. O'bama I heard he may stop by for chili on Saturday.

CHICKEN STIFFER

CH3-GM